This Kind of Sadness

3. This Kind of Sadness.T.aimee-vogelsang-106103-unsplash

This kind of sadness

Doesn’t know how

Or why

It’s too soft to carry

Too hard to cry

 

I’ve been waiting here

As if it’s somebody’s fault

Maybe

I can find some tears

To wash away this salt

 

Sometimes I think of Lot’s lost wife

Looking back

On her emptying life

To say goodbye

Sometimes it’s just too hard

To cry

 

And so this is what I will think of

As home

The things I can’t return to

The things I can never really own

That will always keep me

Alone

 

Here are the train tracks

We used to walk

The sidewalks

Where we wrote our names in chalk

 

I can almost see the smiling face

You painted on a rock once

When we still lived in this place

 

Sometimes we still live

In something you recognize

Sometimes

You still remember

To look in my eyes

And see who I was

See who I am becoming

Someone who loves you

Someone who still believes

In something

 

If only we could let go

Of what gathered between us

 

You are my witness

And I could believe

That something has really seen us

And we are not alone

You are the one I have loved

You are the one I have known

And you have known me

 

Do you still know

 

This is the best I can do

I’m trying to let go

Of the sadness the holds me

Waiting still for life to unfold me

In your arms again

 

Like a piece of paper

Like a secret prayer

You open my secrets

And we become air

 

Something to breathe in

Something to breathe out

 

Sadness isn’t doubt

It’s just what we are missing

And seeking

It’s just you

Who is still kissing me to sleep

Kissing me to keep me alive

 

This is what will survive behind us

The beautiful kingdom

You keep

To remind us

We have each other

To turn to

To turn to

To return to

 

By Julie Flanders
Photo by Aimee Vogelsang

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About octoberprojectmusic

Julie Flanders Marina Belica Emil Adler
This entry was posted in Harmony, Love, October Project, Poetry and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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